I find subliminally-lost pieces of past in these strangers' faces. I find peace in blending in. I find it fascinating that I am able to read the folds of their minds like obvious charades. Have you ever, at any given point of your existence, think that you had rid your old self for good? Recall that time of super confusion as your skin shed and the walls of your insides fall apart, from the folds of your crooked brain down to your intestine so you digested them all down, excreted it all out of your system?
I just want to tell you that those skins, those walls weren't fallible. We all change like traffic lights change their names from green to red, yellow, to green again. On the run, in the end, we're still what our cores suggest us we are. I don't know how to say it but, your old self is spilling through those little cracks. I can see the past piecing itselves. I do not belong in your past and right now, I am walking into it for the first time, dissecting a core of which I do not reside, trying to come to an understanding. But of course, of course, we're all strangers that can only see the front each of us offers and not much beyond that, unless. It is not mine to say, "I know you," when still, I struggled, greedy to take in any details I could get from a brief glance of your familiar face.
Let's walk down the alley where I can see through your daydreams.
Fears. Tell me your fears. I'm the one you tell your fears to. I'll take you down to one-way streets, "I fear a lot but death, death isn't registering," Oblivion. Or so I was told. Your daydreams are harmless but at some parts, you have died. Those are the places where time is still. They do not simply fall apart. They just stopped being what they was. It's less posthumous life, more like a reincarnation.
I know you're those patient kinds. The ones that 'would do things differently if you're dead by tomorrow' and so I am. The only difference between us is that I do not regret. Perhaps you don't too but we're still not the same. Let the expansion of the universe take a toll on our expiry dates and the world will follow its own course as we tag along. Maybe we need to stop being so patient? We're living inertia law and it's about time the external force gives us a good slap in the face.
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Do you remember the maps? Please don't memorize anything. This is a backdrop on a much bigger thing that this won't matter. This is partially a wasted journey.
